Harder than you know.
This feeling quite sucks.I was suppose to stop running away from reality but look at what i'm doing again.I don't know how to face this world.I feel like running away, taking a break and coming back when everything is back on track.Because i can tell you, this is quite killing me.It's like, IF i get to see you or talk to you, i'll just cry out and tell you everything that has been weighing on my mind since forever.So what if there're many guys out there? There's only one you.It's impossible for you to be replaced.Though, deep inside, i do feel that nothing'll come out of this, i still want to hold on to that lil bit of hope that one day things'll change.I mean, nothing lasts forever, right? Call me mad, stupid or silly but after going thru almost a year with you, i simply find it difficult to give up.11 more days to January 17.
Someday, i really do wish that things'll change overnight or better still, i'm able to rewind back time and go back to those days when i took your presence for granted.Now that i've learnt my lesson, i'm afraid that it's all too late for regrets.At times it just feels crazy.How did i even fall for you? "If you’re in love, but afraid to tell the person for some reasons, just think about this: one moment of embarrassment? Or a lifetime regret?" - Twitter.About that, i seriously don't know.I want to tell you everything that's been weighing on my mind but something is stopping me.Fear.I don't know what will happen in the next few months.I'm scared, really scared that this time around everything is really over.
Wasn't feeling emo, just a bit down because no matter how much i promise myself that i'll get over you, i'm unable to do so.Alright enough.Nothing much to blog about these days cause i've been staying home to catch up on my sleep that i've been losing since the year started cause of this fear inside me regarding my results.My confidence level is like 0.00000001%.It's like my fate is already sealed.I might just end up at ITE.No, i don't freakin' look down cause that's also a place for education but it's just a longer route.I feel as though i'm letting a lot of people down.But fuck, it's my life.Monday is results day.If i see that my L1R4 is like ... , i'll totally breakdown.Like who wouldn't? I know i should be more confident and such but this is just me, after all.I'll just hope for the best, yeah? Good luck to all those taking their results on Monday anyway! :>
Got a job @Triumph.This time around, i'm determined to work hard and not give up half-way.The clock shows 11:43 PM.Worn-out from all the shopping in the afternoon.First time, i'm feeling this tired after shopping.4 more days to the 10th, nervous.Guess i shall end here, xo.