It's been long since i updated this space.What can i say? I thought it's better to stop all this before it's too late.Is it i'm fickle-minded or is it just in our case that i'm fickle-minded? I really don't know.I wanted to pay you back in your own coin thus i went all the way out to try hurting you but in the end, i failed to do so.Because hurting you is like hurting my own self.Cliche much but i mean it.I don't know how but over time, you've become a part of me.
Well, was reading @Dorothy's blog and i came across one of her blog post about rewinding back time.Maybe if i could, i'd really love to travel back to the past.Well, not in the hope of getting you back or anything but to handle these issues in a more matured manner.I always refused to face up to reality and kept running away from you.Sometimes, i really do wonder whether i'm really 17.If i did have a chance again, i wouldn't hurt you at all.I don't know what's wrong with me but this whole relationship has got me doubting a lot of people.Trust issues.I just have way more serious issues with myself.I wish i could trust you all over again and give you that second chance but i'm unable to do so.Can't you see how serious the trust issue is between us?
At the same time, i'm unable to accept anyone else because i'm afraid that history'll repeat itself.I don't know who to trust.I feel so lost.He's an awesome guy and i shouldn't be getting into this in the first place but i'm sorry, i'm gonna move away before things get too serious.I just want everything to be ok now.I just want some peace, some time alone to sort out my thinking.Is this the right feeling? I don't know, i don't know. Fuck it let's hit the club, i rarely sip but pour me some. Cause when it's all said and done, I ain't gon be the one that he can always run to. I hate liars, fuck love i'm tired of tryin'.