Sup! 4th week at school starts soon! Look at how fast time goes by when you're enjoying school. Exams just around the corners. I'm pretty much nervous about the papers, especially about F&B practical assessment. Yet to even start revising. 6:08 pm now, i've got so much shit to complete. Finish writing my notes for both modules, start on some napkin folding and finishing up my cover letter and resume! Oh lord, so much for wanting to club tonight. There goes all my plans of enjoying my Saturday night.
So much has happened within the past few days.
Suren is out but things are still pretty much in a messed up state. I no longer seem to know what exactly i want. I'm confused. I can't even make a simple decision, le sigh. I really don't wish to be stuck in such a relationship anymore. It's either you make up your mind or just let me go. It hurts to hold on, it hurts to wait. I don't wanna end up losing you again, for the third time. I lost you once. I lost you twice. But the third time around ... i'm sorry, i wouldn't be able to accept that.
Yesterday at Alpha, we were discussing about the plans God has in for us. I really do wonder what God has in for me. I mean, i'm sure everyone else would also love to know what God has in for us. And then we went on to talk about making a mess out of your life. I think i've messed up my life big time. I really, really want you back in my life but i don't know what should i do. What should i do now? Hold on or just let go? Each time you went away, i thought you'd never come back but in the end, you still returned. You still made the effort to contact me. What does that mean? I'm sorry but i'm no longer strong. Who am i kiddin'? I never used to be strong. Gimme a chance to start this all over again, would you? I need your blessings lord, x.
I seemed to have drifted away from what i was actually supposed to blog about! Was looking through all my photos from the previous years. I miss my long hair, hahaha! I miss my Indian bitch from ITE. I miss every single shit. Though i'm loving my life over at SDH, a part of me still does miss ITE. Missing the cafe on the other hand. Got a new job at this Irish pub but i'm still pretty much reluctant to start work in a totally new environment. Nothing to do w/ the working hours or anything. I just miss working w/ the awesome bunch. Sat down the whole night to think about it. Karthik says i should do what my heart says. I guess this is what they mean by passion. The Irish pub is paying me a whole lot better and it's awesome to be working at a pub again but i still have this voice inside me saying that i should go back to the cafe. It has nothing to do w/ the money now, i simply just love working there. Guess it's time i got back, heh! :)