Sunday, November 11, 2012
"I look at you and i'm home."
I know i shouldn't be missing you but i can't help it. Just talked to Karthik earlier on. I swear i can't understand this boy at all. He can act all cold towards me one day and then be the sweetest boyfriend on earth the next day itself. Damn, i don't know what to do. I kind of wanna treasure this boy in my life but i don't really wanna take the risk to start considering him my everything. I don't wanna end up with a broken heart, again. I've still not fully forgotten the past.. i mean, i need more time to let go and be myself again. I'm finally facing up to reality. I've finally realized that maybe it's not gonna work out well the second time around. Maybe you don't care as much as i care about you.. it kinda hurts but i can't do anything anymore. I've done all that i could to salvage this relationship but after this, it's all up to you. If you're gonna let your problems and emotions get in the way of our relationship then there's nothing else i, as an individual, can do. I can't be the only one fighting. I'm tired, you get it?
One thing that i can be pretty sure of even now is that, you can never be replaced by any other guy just like that. You've always been a special someone in my life and even now, you still own a place in my heart. I can't say this to you because it might not matter much to you but just know that i'll always remember you. I don't know what's gonna happen tmrw or the day after but i leave it all to Jesus and fate to decide who i'm gonna end up with in the end.
I don't know what called for this post but i just felt like blogging at this hour. 2:11am and i can't get to sleep. My body's all aching and i've work tmrw so imma use my Sunday to just sleep in and do nothing else. Freaking 8 hours shift again tmrw, i need some sort of energy pill to keep me going. On a totally random note, i miss clubbing. I miss drinking. I miss night life. Damn, look at what working does to me. All i can ever think about now is sleep, sleep and sleep. I needa hit the club soon! I need my fix of alcohol to keep me sane. Alright, i'm outta here, x.
Layout credits @ 16thday :)